When I started publishing the series, I forgot what I really did it for. When the first book came out I was hoping to have a large following and lots of people who could see my vision. But when that wasn’t happening I was feeling down and sad about it. Thinking I made a mistake putting my children out there. I doubted myself and my choices every step of the way.
Then, as the first four months passed, I just lost interest in promoting or spreading the word of my book. Then one day, “she” spoke to me again. (A character who will be introduced soon.) She reminded me that my reasons of bringing them into this world wasn’t for fame. Wasn’t for common interest with others. It was for them. I felt so stupid that I forgot that. My quest was to give them a voice and a home beyond my head.
I don’t care if I only sell one copy per book now. I will no longer be hungry for gathering a fan base. Because that isn’t important. They are. The goal has always been for them to exist beyond the chaos dimension that is my mind. Because if I die, that means they’ll die with me. And that’s not fair. They deserve to exist even after I’m gone. They are my reason to be. My raison d’être.
Once the series is over, I will be sad. But happy that I set them free and gave them a life beyond myself. So until I set them free, I won’t give in. Or I should say I will try really, really, hard not to. She and a few others pull me back from that. But she tries harder than anyone else.
You’ll be born. You will.
Everything I’m doing with this series is for them. And I will never forget it again. Thank you. You have my deepest sentiments and always will.
Then, as the first four months passed, I just lost interest in promoting or spreading the word of my book. Then one day, “she” spoke to me again. (A character who will be introduced soon.) She reminded me that my reasons of bringing them into this world wasn’t for fame. Wasn’t for common interest with others. It was for them. I felt so stupid that I forgot that. My quest was to give them a voice and a home beyond my head.
I don’t care if I only sell one copy per book now. I will no longer be hungry for gathering a fan base. Because that isn’t important. They are. The goal has always been for them to exist beyond the chaos dimension that is my mind. Because if I die, that means they’ll die with me. And that’s not fair. They deserve to exist even after I’m gone. They are my reason to be. My raison d’être.
Once the series is over, I will be sad. But happy that I set them free and gave them a life beyond myself. So until I set them free, I won’t give in. Or I should say I will try really, really, hard not to. She and a few others pull me back from that. But she tries harder than anyone else.
You’ll be born. You will.
Everything I’m doing with this series is for them. And I will never forget it again. Thank you. You have my deepest sentiments and always will.
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